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 Fralsare (not finished yet though...)

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Kips (Big Shot/ admin)
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Female Number of posts : 146
Age : 26
Location : England
Age : Thirteen
Writing forte/s : Weird poetry and awful stories!
Registration date : 2006-08-11

PostSubject: Fralsare (not finished yet though...)   Mon Aug 14, 2006 1:52 pm

Hey guys, I'm not sure if you'lll

When I was seven years old, I found a thing in my attic. Fralsäre was not a man. Fralsäre was more than just a man. He was my new father, my angel… and my saviour. I loved Fralsäre with all my heart. And I think that in a way I still do. I still sometimes find myself thinking about him, as I lie in bed beside my snoring husband, as I clean the tiny flat where I live, as I…. But wait. I’m getting ahead of myself. Let me start from the beginning.

My name is Olivia Hicks, although my maiden name is Marston. I was born into a small family and we lived in a small house in the small village of Tapely Green. My early life was pretty uneventful, up until I turned four. I had two brothers, James and Paul, twins, who were five years older than me. They usually ignored me, preferring to go out to the park and play football. My mother was a rampant housewife, busy with her social life; far too busy for motherhood. Because of this, I was quite a daddy’s girl, following him around whenever he was home and growing despondent whenever he wasn’t.
I won’t try to work out the reasons for my father’s behaviour, since to be honest; I don’t really want to understand. It isn’t clear what he hoped to achieve through his behaviour and I doubt that it ever will be. All I know, is that when I was four years old he began to touch me in ways that he should never have done.
It started with a few comforting pats on the thigh I suppose, the sort you might expect from any doting father. But slowly, over time, it progressed to other sorts of touching, in other places. It’s funny, but it never occurred to me that I should tell someone. He was my father, and sure, sometimes what he did made me feel uncomfortable, but he was still my dad and he’d never do anything to hurt me. Right? And so, for three years, my father continued to take advantage of me, almost every time we were alone. I had a lot of conflicting feelings at the time. A part of me was honoured by his attention and special. I often enjoyed him touching me, telling me he loved me. I liked to make him happy. But I didn’t like it when it hurt, as it often did. I disliked him making me do things, even when I didn’t want to. He always used to say things like, “Don’t you love me?” and of course, desperate to prove my devotion and love for him, I allowed him to do whatever it was he wanted to.
I was six when my father first raped me. I don’t remember it very much, only that it hurt a lot and for days afterwards I felt as though my entire pelvis had been dislocated and put back together all wrong. I’ve spent many an hour trying to remember more, trying to remember what he said, how I felt. But I can’t. it would appear that this first episode was enjoyable for my father for he raped me at least once a month for the next year. Sometimes I fought him, deciding that it was worth his wrath and… disappointment because it really wasn’t worth it. Even then, when I was unsure of what we were doing, I had the feeling that it was wrong. Other times though, I simply allowed it to happen, glad that at least my father loved me and wanted to make me happy. For a part of me still thought that that must be his motive.
When I was seven I made some new friends at school. They were a gang of girls, well known for being naughty and telling lies. It was while I was with them that I first learned the concept of Sex. To the other girls it seemed ridiculous and disgusting. They didn’t believe the girl who told them, Maria. So the following day she brought in a book, entitled Where do babies come from?, hidden up her sweatshirt. It was true. The book informed us that when a man and a woman love each other very much, they decide to show each other this by having Sex. Some people also did it to have babies. I had a lot to think about that day.
Surely this was proof that my daddy loved me a lot. Much more, it would seem, that other daddies did their daughters, since I was almost certain that none of the other girls had this odd concept of Sex with their fathers. So he really did love me. I wasn’t a woman but that hardly mattered. It just showed how grown up I was. So I was contented for a while. Except that a small concern niggled in my head. Some people did it to have babies… of course, I wasn’t quite certain how that part worked, since we didn’t have a lot of time to read that book, but I knew enough to be worried. What if I had a baby? I was grown up, true enough, but I was still only seven, and, I thought sensibly, that’s much to young to have a baby. And so I fretted.
One day, when I had finished my homework and been put to bed by my mother who then breezed off to some party, my father came into my room, locking the door after him. I pretty much knew what he was going to do and so I sat up.
“Hello daddy.” I said. He smiled gently and sat beside my bed.
“Hi, princess. How was your day?” he asked, beginning to rub his had rhythmically up and down my leg.
“Ok daddy but… there’s something I need to ask you,” my head was yelling at me to stop but I’d started now so I ploughed on, “Daddy… I know that we do this ‘cause we love each other but… oh daddy, I don’t want to have a baby!” My dad’s soft features hardened.
“Now, princess, don’t be silly. Daddy would never let that happen! I’m always going to look after you because I love you. You can’t have a baby! Wherever did you hear that?” I was too scared to tell him about the book, but luckily it seemed that it was not the sort of question he wanted answered. Instead he simply smiled again and pulled me onto his lap. I felt relieved that there would be no baby and allowed him to do whatever it was he wanted to.
I think it was around this time that I seriously began to consider what happened between my father and me. It made me more and more uncomfortable.

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Female Number of posts : 129
Age : 27
Location : England :]
Age : 14
Registration date : 2006-08-11

PostSubject: Re: Fralsare (not finished yet though...)   Tue Aug 15, 2006 11:48 am

woah. spookish.

this is amazing.
i'm doing my homework atm so i was only gonna read the first paragraph and then read the rest later but i couldnt stop!

you have a real talent and this story is really showing it off, i was hooked by the way Olivia seems so real and so innocent to her horrid dad. You've really gotten into the mind of this little girl and shown us what shes thinking and feeling very accuratley.

definatley carry it on.
xx||xx

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